It took you long enough, Albuquerque.

Albuquerque’s Blue Line Rapid Ride Internet is finally online, meaning that if you’re on the bus you can now use your computer on the Internet. ‘N’ shit.

In honor of this sacred event which we all hold so dear in our fat geeky virgin asses and fat cholesterol-filled hearts, I have removed both the article in which I attacked the drunken scuzzballs that ask me how much my computer is every time I get on the bus, and the article in which I attacked the City of Albuquerque for not putting Internet on the Blue Line Rapid Ride so I could make hateful blog posts about how stupid people like you, the person reading this article, are. Now I can attack you even while riding on the bus. Ha. Ha. Etcetera. Expect me to use this newfound ability constantly from now on.

Expect a new article on Transformers having gay sex with each other, or furries having gay sex with each other, or circumcision, or possibly how much Maddox blows, or something else involving penises and homosexuality in the near future. And once again: Thanks, City of Albuquerque! I really fuckin’ appreciate it. Assholes.

Update (7:36 PM MST, August 10, 2009): I’ve noticed I’m the one who’s been reading this article more than anybody else. Considering how I said I write posts about how stupid the people who read my articles are, I think this has very troubling implications.

Update (7:38 PM MST, August 10, 2009): I have decided at least one person who reads my articles isn’t stupid. At least, I don’t think he is. And he is a he. I checked. Definitely a he.

Update (7:39 PM MST, August 10, 2009): I would also like to state for the record that I was not on the bus when I checked the gender of the one person who reads my articles that isn’t stupid. Nobody needs to see that stuff, man.

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