Building a Democracy for Little Dead Plastic People

Lego design is such that the imagination rules over realities seen in real life. Rather than calculating wall sizes, weight loads, how many windows a room needs to have, or plumbing problems, a Lego designer needs only slap some bricks together and make something beautiful.

Doesn’t that suck?

The reason that I build with Legos is to become a part of that untapped potential, that potential Legos have for being so complicated that no child could ever play with them again. And so, I’m always building new stuff for my Lego City.

At first, I was thinking very simple. For example, I started out building a democratic state for my Lego citizens. I’d make a little quiz stating all the political opinions one could have, the more liberal, the lower the number. Conservative opinions would get a 3, 2, or 1 number; moderates would receive a zero; and liberals would get a -3, -2, or -1. The sum total of all of their opinions (generated on a random number generator) would determine their political stance, and therefore who they’d vote for. I held a senatorial election this way, which determined several things:

• My minifigures were divided, 3-2, in favor of Liberal.
• All of the more liberal districts were located on the west side of Luigiville’s Plaza Central, whereas all the conservative ones were on the East Side.
• I really, really need to get out more often.
• Or go out, as the case may be.

So, anyway, that system is still there, and it’s on my computer. It’s part of my little nation’s “Constitution”, which provides for, among other things, the abolition of slavery and the Equal Rights Amendment. The Constitution is somewhere on the order of ten pages long, with sections dealing with statutory law, a democratic form of government, and a complete list of Lego figure behaviors, such as who’s in support of gay marriage, immigration, and other figures; who likes various hobbies; who’s male or female or gay or straight; and (naturally) who’s a nerd or a jock. (Because it matters.)

In addition to just a Constitution, I want to make my Lego figures into tiny robots. I have complete schematics for making it work, including motor placement, making them “see”, and other such things that really, really matter. I plan to have more information in just years, or possibly millenia, if I can find it that quickly. I’m also planning on calling Lego.

Why? Because I think I need help.