Cabbage Causes Massive Explosion

I decided to write this post today, because after reviewing my last one, I instantaneously realized it made far too much sense. Today, I am going to just write something incredibly random.

So you know about how whenever clouds come down out of the sky, it usually means a tornado, or that you are about to die, or something? Well, obviously, that’s what I saw today. There was this big cloud falling over Rio Rancho, and it was all coming down, and down, AND DOWN AND DOWN AND AHHHHH AND AHHHHH

Uh… Anyway.

Yes. Oh, yes, and, I also have news about Luigiville. No, wait, about some girl. No, wait. Ok, yes. Do you normally eat cabbage? Because cabbage will make you fart. Yes, I know, that is difficult to believe, but it will, in fact, make gas escape from your assal regions. That is the report of the Fartknocker Institute, run by Dr. John Fartknocker. In his words: “Cabbage contains large quantities of hydrogen, which is explosive. Therefore, if you eat too much, you will explode. This is shown by the incredible farting of my colleague, who often makes entire cities explode into smelly flame. His farts, it should be noted, are Silent but Deadly.”

So, in retrospect, it appears that: AHHHHHHHH…….

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Red and Green’s General Store: A LEGO construction for the stars, if your stars aren’t too good

Ah, old Red and Green’s General Store. This is one of my favorite designs. After construction, I waited over a year to send it to MOCPages, a site dedicated to putting people’s LEGO creations over the Internet. That was this week. I wrote on it at http://www.mocpages.com/ moc.php/16490
If you’ll notice, this picture to the left isn’t the photo I put on MOCPages. That’s because I’m going to begin trying to use Blogger instead of my crappy AOL account to upload images. I like Blogspot. It works well if you use Firefox.

Speaking of Firefox, I’ve fixed the site so Firefox users can finally see it. I want to delete my AOL browser stuff and just use the AOL Dialer and Firefox. Every time I use AOL I wind up clicking Settings and getting AOL crap. Firefox acts like a Corgi, always being nice and quiet and only occasionally biting one’s ankles. I like that. Plus it uses less of Zippy’s limited RAM.

Oh, you didn’t know about Zippy? He’s my little laptop. Just a little $500 thing we picked up at CompUSA. I named him after Dave Barry’s dog, Zippy, his emergency backup dog. My Zippy is my emergency backup computer. So there.

I hope I can start making this site funnier. Most of the stuff you see on the Internet isn’t worth squat. Maddox is boring after a few loads, Something Awful is awful, and the blogs are atrocious. Is there anything besides porn that people look at on the Internet?

So that’s why my posts sometimes sound a little bit like Dave Barry posts. I’ve been trying to make my site funny, so it’s actually worth reading, and also to get back at Maddox. For writing a hateful column about CompUSA, which, unless you have a short attention span, you’ll remember I got Zippy from.

That’s it. I’ve got some cool interior photos of Red and Green’s on MOCPages. I’ll start uploading a new creation every month or two. Next up will probably be the police station, one of my favorites and a customized LEGO set, Metro PD Station, #6591. It’s a bit rough-hewn, I think, but it’s acceptable. Just you wait and see.

Now, let me go back to fantasizing about being funny. Heh-heh.