Not a lot of questions have been asked on The Luigiian, but a lot of comments have been given, often by retards, but that is not the point. I’ve decided to write out some of these comments in question form so that I can angrily sneer at you behind my computer screen.

I need help finding out whether there’s a DVD/computer card/book that corresponds to my computer card/book/DVD.

Well, sorry, there’s no way I can help you, inasmuch as I live in Albuquerque, New Mexico and spend most of my days reading Something Awful forum posts.

That’s another thing, you write about Something Awful a lot, and you usually write about how shitty they are concerning furries. Why the interest in animal porn all of the sudden?

SA sucks, specifically Lowtax. I wouldn’t even give a shit about furries except for the fact that they tend to piss people off, so I figure they’re a great thing to talk about on my blog, and besides, I do try to keep it to a minimum. For the record, though, from my research it looks like furries aren’t just a group of people that are into animal porn.

Then what are they?

A group of people who enjoy dressing up in animal costumes, watching kiddie animal cartoons and looking at a lot more animal porn than a group of people that just like dressing up in animal costumes and watching kiddie animal cartoons should ever look at.

You sound like a sad nerd obsessed with LEGOs and hentai. You should never blog again. It’s sad to see somebody of your writing caliber reducing himself to this level.

Why? I figure, if it’s what I want to write about, that’s what I should write about.

I think Kaycee should get a restraining order against you.

Look, just because I called Kaycee, the Beauty of our Age and Center of our Universe Squirrel Cheeks is meaningless. I mean seriously, what would you say? You have to give the hot ones a little joshing every once in a while, or else they start turning mean and nasty to everyone because they think they’re the best. There’s only one best, and it’s Kaycee, the Girl of Ultimate Beauty, and therefore she needs the most joshing at all.
I think your LEGO city is further proof that you are insane and need major help.

Nah. My LEGO city is proof that I am sane. You see, LEGO designers are inherently stable and normal because they realize the futility of life. In the end, it doesn’t matter how old you are or how powerful you become in life, LEGOs are still badass and always will be. They are the ultimate rock stars of toys. There is no better.

I want to run for governor of Luigiville.

No.

You seem to have a hearty dislike for Mexicans, why did you include making fun of Mexicans in your article on the City of Albuquerque bus system, you racist piece of shit?

Why not? I made fun of lots of different people in the article.

Because it’s racist.

You haven’t answered my question. I made fun of white people too. I made fun of hippies, the handicapped, women, fat women, the bus drivers, the buses, poor people, and the mentally retarded. Everybody who’s attacked me on the article centers on race. Where the hell are your priorities?

But you talked about them like you didn’t like them.

I didn’t like anybody on the bus. The vast majority of the people on the bus happened to be Hispanic, so the vast majority of people I didn’t like on the bus happened to be Hispanic. Very simple, next question please.

Fine. You didn’t respond to my comment, why not?

Because I don’t want to make anybody feel left out. I only respond when I feel like they’ve said something very meaningful.

You sound like my kind of prankster type person.

Good. I hope that you understand that I’m just joking.

One last question. What will you do if you never get anything from this site?

I’ll just keep writing. If you think I do this just to get your attention, you’re dead wrong.